prototype.

if there had ever been
one
person
perfect for me,
it's you.
the tone of your voice.
velvety & deep,
is emblazoned in my mind,
right along with
all those seemingly
insignificant
words you've spoken.
the poetry that you exude from your every pore.
how could I not
feel some kind of confusingly beautifully terrifying
way
for you?
at times,
I want nothing more than for you to
fall for someone else.
to lie in the arms of another
and break my heart
one
final
time
simply so that I don't ruin our friendship
by giving into the emotions that
course
through my bloodstream
with every
b
e
a
t
of my heart.
and at much more frequent times,
I cross my fingers, wishing and hoping
that I am the one
who drives you crazy at night
who keeps your mind from rest
who causes you to stay awake
at times when you want nothing more than to sleep.
I want to be the one without whom
you can't
seem to
breathe.
the desire crosses my mind
moment after moment...
wanting to be nothing more than the one
about whom you dream
each
and
every
night.
to pull you in
almost as much as you
pull me.

reciprocity.

then there are the moments
when I know not
your feelings toward me
and can only remember the
wonderful things
about you.
i can only remember
how you make me
smile
at times when
everything else
seems to force
tears
from my eyes.
how your voice
your laugh
makes my heart leap
just a bit.
it is in those moments
that
i pray that if you are
not
the one,
that i can meet someone
who is
very much
like you
in my futurelife.
where he can stay forever.